December 3, 2021

Kid Speak, Part 4

Kid Speak

We all know kids are full of potential and can often surprise us with great revelations about the world we live in. They can also say some pretty funny stuff…

If you have heard a child say something funny enough to repeat, Submit Them Here!

4th grade girl – “Do these computers get Hulu?”

Teacher – “How come?”

Girl – “I missed Empire last night and need to catch up.”

With 10 minutes left in class on the last day of school.

Conrad – “What can I do to bring my grade up from a 46 to at least an 82 so I don’t have to go to summer school?”

Teacher – (Successfully resists urge to laugh in students face…)

Kindergarten Boy – “When I grow up I want to be a daddy.”

Boy’s Twin Brother – “And when I grow up, I want to be a mommy!”

8th Grade Girl 1 – “You know, next year everyone will move for us.”

8th Grade Girl 2 – “I know right!”

Mom – “What do you mean?”

Girl 1 – “In the hallways.”

Girl 2 – “Like, no one moves for the 6th graders, 6th graders move for the 7th graders, and everyone moves for 8th graders.”

Girl 1 – “It’s like the food chain. We’re the lions, 7th graders are gazelles and 6th graders are whatever gazelles eat.”

Mom – “Grass?”

Girl 1 – “Um, yeah!”

At a car show

Mom – “Which car was your favorite?”

5 year old boy – “I loved that one truck that had no doors and was full of hookers.”

Mom – “Full of what?”

Boy – “You know, hookers!”

*DISCLAIMER – For the protection of the children involved, no real names will be used. When necessary, all boys will be named Conrad and all girls will be named Casey, after my two childhood dogs.

Nate Compton

Nate Compton

Attempting to teach future generations the benefits of a nerdy life, Nate spends his days molding the minds of children, and his nights nerding it up anyway he can. Trek over Wars, Michigan over State, and Marvel over DC. What else do you need to know?

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